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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 9/6/2009 1:26:51 PM
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fiery
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LOL, really? I've never seen it myself. :) And there was me thinking you weren't scared of anything.
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 9/7/2009 12:53:46 AM
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dianerene
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HA! Courtney and I sat down and watched it one day ... yeah, not sure I am strict enough for it, and it definitely left me with some appreciation for my own children :) they arent so bad afterall
_____________________________
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 9/14/2009 6:21:16 AM
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ArticlePost
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my daughter is just 15, plenty of attitude... but its the lies i am getting thats getting me down.. being a single mum due tohr father choosing drink and drugs over parenting and has never paid maintenance.. my daughter hated the drug use and we totally agreed that we would not have it in our homes or our lives.. now i have discovered that my daughter is secretly meeting her dad at his place and has completely lied about it ... it caused quite an argument between us about a month ago.. she told me that her dad was harassing her so she gave in ..my fear is her acceptance of the drug and alcohol use as I struggle to clothe and feed her she is becoming as deceitful as her dad and I cant stand the lies.. don,t want to push my daughter further away but I am so angry about all the lying... what can I do
gwen
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 9/19/2009 12:21:43 PM
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ArticlePost
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19 year old son does nothing but sleep and play computer games, he is limited but when i leave he is back on, he is on unemployment and instead of helping pay bills and buy groceries he buys a $200 kite, i get the job applications i tell him to fill them out and call... never calls he goes from the bed to the couch.. college ha thats a on going issue,, showers nother on going issue,,, eye doctor he wont pay for it dentist he wont pay for it.. i dont think i should have to pay for anything anymore.. im at my wits end. i work 6 days a week to hear dont we have pop??? i say go buy some... o yea wont get a drivers licences either.. ok done venting....
cathy
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 9/27/2009 1:53:13 PM
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ArticlePost
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I have a 18 year old son that recently graduationed from high school and is looking for a job with no luck. He will be starting community college in January, however, he does not apply any effort until I get after him to get his butt in gear. He feels Iam crazy and his step-dad is just mean to him. I have explained to him that I am concerned about being a productive adult. The only time his does anything it because I have to get after him. The true problem Iam having is Iam exhausted! Getting to do anything is a war. I have taken everthing away from him and he does not really seem to care as long as he does not have to put forth effort. At this point, I have told him to just move and go sponge off one of his friends. He is all for this when I get on him to do something but he keeps coming back and the cycle start all over again. I have a 6 years who listen requires less effort then he ever did. He is a "good" kid in the sense he is not get in trouble (never has) outside the home. HELP...I feel so guilty for resenting his laziness. Thanks for listening.
Christine
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 9/28/2009 11:51:18 PM
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Familyeducator
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Yes, it is a topic that never goes away. I have a teenager that thinks money grows on a tree!!
I have found 2 books that has helped my teen change her attitude about where money comes from, and how it can help her in the future.
Most kids and teens struggle with money and have a poor knowledge of the subject when they leave school. I believe that these books can give them a sound basic knowledge and I am sure that parents and caregivers will also learn from them. Invest in your child’s future and see how at http://www.familyebooks.net/eBooks.aspx
We have not looked back since, and even our teen now appreciates all we do for her.
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 10/1/2009 7:49:50 AM
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ArticlePost
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And just think these lazy ungratful kids are our future..
Ted
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 11/15/2009 8:00:53 AM
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ArticlePost
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Just smile when you can and learn to live in the house with them until they are 18 then show them the door. They wont speak to you for years but will eventually wise up and learn to appreciate how good they did have it at home. Their laziness will then be confronted with their children and as the grandparent,well just sit back and have a good laugh or two!
Dad
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 11/17/2009 7:34:47 AM
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mom confussed
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Thank God I am not the only mom with daughters that are so lazy and unwilling to help out, I think I may move myself.
My 15 year old moved back with me over this past summer, bringing with her a sister that is 20 and only goes to a local college (has no car and no job), until 12pm everyday. I like some of the moms I have read on here, have pretty much taken everything away except being able to have a room to sleep in. My 15 year old refuses to do homework, refuses to do chores and my husband, their step dad, says I need to use tough love. WEll I have taken everything away and I mean everything. TV,Computer other than homework and it is in the same room as our family living room, no friends over and they go no where and no cell phone. She lies to the teacher about work being done, I find out through email, its is not done. She has failed out of 2 elective classes and she now has 2 study halls, and the work is still not done and she does not care.
Oh my gosh, this wears me out, because when she goes no where, i cant trust her so I go no where, my marriage is suffering so much because of my daughters. My ex inlaws help some but they too are at their last straw as well as their real dad.
What on earth can I do? I can't even get a part-time job because I am a taxi service. Can someone tell me what to do I am 39 and I have no life for my husband or myself for having to keep these girls out of trouble and fight with them daily over the same stuff.
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 11/28/2009 2:39:04 PM
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ericagarettson
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It doesn't always work, but if you can find something that your teenager is passionate about then it could help to stimulate that passion. It would be great if you had something in common
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 11/29/2009 12:35:18 PM
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fiery
Posts: 5730
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Nice to meet you mom confussed. Welcome to FamilyLobby. You sorely need to time out, that's for sure, for yourself and your husband to be a couple again. Please elaborate a little on some points.
In what way are you a taxi service? If you mean for your daughter and sister to get to school/college, can't they take the bus? If you mean extracurricular activities like going out with buddies, they shouldn't have any activities like that. That's a privilege, not a right, and is earned when you do what you're supposed to.
What's stopping the 20 year old getting a part time job if she's only at college till noon? You may want a job yourself to get out of the house and that's understandable. How does she manage for money though?
Your husband and their father both say they need tough love but that's a very general statement. What are they doing in practical terms to support you when you say, take things away, or lay down the law? They need to back you up with their actions, not just words.
Could there be a health related problem like depression with your daughter? Take her for a check up.
I would tell the girls Christmas is canceled unless you see BIG long term changes in the next three weeks ie doing homework, housework, better attitudes, looking for a part time job (the older one) and so on. Add anything you want to see different and mean it.
Think that's too harsh? They still expect to behave like that, not contribute, and be showered with gifts just because it says so on the calendar it's that time of year? Don't do it. And don't let others in the family get them stuff either if they don't shape up. That's the kind of tough love they're talking about that the kids need and they need to walk the walk and all the adults stand firm together on that. It's not cruel or mean. What's cruel and mean is they are practically adults themselves and are allowing you to make yourself ill with stress and worry over them yet don't care about that either.
I'd suggest you get yourself a checkup too.
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 1/27/2010 7:30:46 AM
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ArticlePost
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I have a 15 year old son that is being defient to no end....dont want to go to school...disrespectful,mouthy I wish there was an instuction manual on how to deal with certain situations. If Im positive he finds his way to make it negative!Dont know what else to do!!!!!
MOMof4
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 1/29/2010 10:57:35 PM
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ArticlePost
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I got a 17 year old step son that is being "home schooled" online with no supervision. My husband doesn't get any progress reports, only the bills to what I believe is a scam. We just got married a month ago and the kids mother decides to send him over becuase she couldn't deal with his lazyness which she has taught him to be like that in the first place. All the kid does is sleep until noon, drink cases of pop soda and play video games. This is not the newly wed life that I imagined.
Sorella
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 2/9/2010 5:18:59 AM
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ArticlePost
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I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.Lucyhttp://dataentryjob-s.com
anonymous
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 2/15/2010 9:04:42 AM
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ArticlePost
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There has been some great idea's on how to deal with a lazy, foul mouth teenager. Thank you for the help. She's mostly a great kid but then everyonce in awhile she shuts down and says I don't care! misses school/bus and then it seems like I have to scramble and pick up the peices so she ruin her life! what am I doing wrong?
Elizabeth
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 4/11/2010 6:07:39 PM
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ArticlePost
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Just exercise tough love and assign immediate and dramatic consequences to every perceived violation of even the most nonsensical rule. Bully them into adulthood TOUGH LOVE style.
Bully them
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 4/25/2010 9:47:55 PM
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ArticlePost
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I already do all these things if i hire him for a 20 minute job it takes him three hours. washing a days worth of dishes for a family of four takes him an hour and a half then another hour to wipe down the counters and put the dishes away. when he's at work he's like an hour behind all the other bussers at his job. i just don't know what to do. it's like he just doesn't care
dustin
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 4/28/2010 7:20:33 PM
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ArticlePost
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After 15 years with my step son, you'd think that I would have earned a bit of respect in his eyes. Not only did I welcome him into my life, I gave him love, support, and family stability. Now that he's older and toilet trained, his father is taking a sudden interest. It's much easier to take a 17 year old out to dinner, shopping, and a movie as opposed to a 3 year old. Now he's resentful of his mother and I for not providing an ideal family for him. He's angry at his mom for not making a family work with his biological father. He's angry all the time, mouthy, steals from us, and uses drugs in our house while we are home. A few weeks ago he attacked his mother for telling him to turn down his music. He's very much out of control and we've explained to him that he will not be welcome in our home after his 18th birthday, which is just around the corner. He won't find a job, won't go to school, and won't stop using drugs. Should I feel guilty about kicking him out of the house?
Frustrated step dad
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 4/28/2010 9:46:54 PM
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fiery
Posts: 5730
Joined: 11/4/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ArticlePost
After 15 years with my step son, you'd think that I would have earned a bit of respect in his eyes. Not only did I welcome him into my life, I gave him love, support, and family stability. Now that he's older and toilet trained, his father is taking a sudden interest. It's much easier to take a 17 year old out to dinner, shopping, and a movie as opposed to a 3 year old. Now he's resentful of his mother and I for not providing an ideal family for him. He's angry at his mom for not making a family work with his biological father. He's angry all the time, mouthy, steals from us, and uses drugs in our house while we are home. A few weeks ago he attacked his mother for telling him to turn down his music. He's very much out of control and we've explained to him that he will not be welcome in our home after his 18th birthday, which is just around the corner. He won't find a job, won't go to school, and won't stop using drugs. Should I feel guilty about kicking him out of the house?
Frustrated step dad
In a word, no. Why should you be? You have tried and he's refused to comply with your wishes. Welcome to Family Lobby, frustrated step dad. 
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RE: How to Deal with Lazy Teenagers - 5/3/2010 10:00:22 AM
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ArticlePost
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thanx for these information its really helpful
john u k
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