RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (Full Version)

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ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/12/2008 2:09:48 AM)

me and my italian-american husband married in a civil rites here in the philippines.before the marriage happened,i asked him if he still love his ex-chinese wife.he said yes,and he's confuse about our marriage.i felt so hurt and pain.i told him to be sure before marrying me,his answers are inconsistent.like yesterday he will say no,and today yes he's sure.his ex-wife wanted a divorced for she wants chldren but my husband cant give her a child for he's too old already.and now,we've got married on november 1.and he's now in chicago..he told me when he arrived,his ex-wife is very angry and always crying coz he married again.and they're back together now and give each other a final chance.please give me an advice..im so super hurt now and feeling a pity for myself.i dont know what to do..email me please with ur advice on my email account melodina_palang@yahoo.com..please

charife palang



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/12/2008 9:37:39 PM)

Its really weird reading all of your comments as I have had feelings come back from my previous husband. I have remarried, but I have been thinking about my previous husband quite a bit lately. Is it normal?? I keep saying that to myself; according to most of you it is and some of you went as far as remarrying your e-spouse; WOW! I often think "what if" but I could never hurt my husband I am married to now, but deep down inside, thinking about my previous husband, its almost a warm feeling and somewhat contented feeling. Isnt it sad. In my position; I know I will never have the opportunity to remarry my previous husband. Even though I think and know the stress would evaporate, and warm contented feelings would surface again, and the children and grandchildren...wow what a difference it would make. How did all of you do it?? Maybe I missed it; did any of you marry a second time and then divorced and remarry your first spouse?? I am very curious to know.

M



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/15/2008 11:18:12 AM)

I would remarry my ex because we have both grown and grown up, we have children together and the family is the only real thing in our lives. Most divorces are very selfish and we have forgot how to stay committed beyond how we feel , we keep score and gather information on being right about your spouse being a certain way that leads to your decision . We forgot how to get out of our own way and its something we lack on the inside.Higher love comes from peeling back the layers of deception and give up your entitlements .

daniel



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/18/2008 10:09:53 PM)

See the new Kurt Cameron movie called: FIREPROOF!

mary j



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/19/2008 9:03:17 AM)

Well, the same attraction would probably always be there.. perhaps after all those those years, they learned and grew in a way that they could have a successful relationship. Maybe they just weren't ready the first time. Good luck to them

Melissa



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/20/2008 4:06:49 PM)

My husband and I have been married for 4 years. Its been tough because he has a hard time dealing with pressure. (like when he doesn't have a job) and he runs away for months at a time. This time he cheated on me with another woman. Sometimes I think we can work it out, but I know it will end in divorce because he said he doesn't want to be married any more. He left the house and has been gone for 3 months, but he keeps calling me so that I cannot heal. Although I want it to work this time, once it is over- it's over. I'm not mad at him, I just think I deserve better. I would never remarry my soon to be x-husband.

Aaja



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/21/2008 12:55:53 PM)

Hmmm..where to start. I'm in an interesting situation now. I have been divorced from my first husband for many years. I had remarried after that and that marriage also ended up in divorce. I have been gone from my home state for over 7 years and recently I moved home. Somehow, the lines of communication have reopened with Ex-husband #1. I can't lie either, there are a lot of feelings for him still there. Anyhow, we are thinking of getting back together. But, for now he is deployed over seas and won't be back on American soil for 10 more months. So, we're thinking we can use that time, take things slow, and get to know each other all over again. Any advice on how to pull this kinda thing off and have it work out happily???

Karin Mc



dianerene -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/22/2008 10:49:43 PM)

Military marriages are so hard as it is ... the time away from each other during deployments and then the changes and experiences that they bring home ... it takes a very strong couple to make a marriage work, and even more strength and dedication to endure the military, IMO.
I think starting slow is a great idea.  You were in love once, there is no reason why you can't be in love again.  The only thing I would be aware of is WHY you split to begin with ... changes are easy to make temporarily, but not always easy to keep permanent.  If it's a challenge you both want to take on than GREAT!

good luck and thank your man from my family!



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/25/2008 4:39:50 PM)

There seems to br alot to this phenominon of re-marraige to ex spouse. I am currently engaged to my ex-husband of 18 years. There's an old saying, can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. Well, I think most people feel that way from time to time in their marriages. We grew apart and lack of communication and quality alone time invested in one another sunk us. We tried christian counciling and individual counciling. They seemed to make it worse. I totally fell apart during and after the divorce. I felt a huge part of my life and body had been ripped from me. Every time I saw him I fell in love and fell apart all over again. I could tell he felt the same way. We started to date and talk about where things really went wrong. We both had dated post-divorce and agreed, there wasn't anyone we had met that came close to what we had. Yes, we still get mad at each other, and yes, we still have some of the same issues. But we both realize that they are quite small compared to what we love about each other. I can't picture my life with anyone else, I've tried. What God has joined, let no man put assunder.

Bonnie



gia.master08 -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (11/28/2008 4:19:53 AM)

I may never,  there is an old saying that goes, "An ex is an ex for a reason." But again I'm nothing against it, the great thing about human nature is that there is always the capacity to forgive and forget, to let bygones be bygones, and to start anew. I remember I had seen an opinion poll about ‘There is always one Ex you still miss’ sounds true with some people.



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (12/8/2008 11:56:52 PM)

I wish that I could turn back time and erase my divorce. I remarried very quickly and immediately realized it was a huge mistake. My first husband made a lot of mistakes throughout our 18 year marriage, but I believe he has learned from them. He was destroyed by the divorce. Now, all I can think about is finding a way back to him~and ending my current marriage which has been a disaster from the start. He has no chance considering the way I feel. Ultimately, I never saw myself as a divorced person, and now my only hope is that I can grow old with my children's father and that we can care for each other as we grow older.

k



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (12/12/2008 3:00:14 AM)

I was married for 7 years, in the relationship 10 years. My husband wanted the divorce because he did not want to "involve" me in his business deal, which ended up failing. Now he says he wants to remarry in the future. I have tried to date other men and to move on, but it is hopeless. My heart beats for this man. Every time I try to date someone else, it feels like I'm cheating on him. When I am not with him, my stomach hurts and my chest is full of anxiety. I only feel at peace when I am with him, holding him in my arms. I will remarry him, if that is truly what he wants. And all the other men trying to date me, I have ran them all off. I did so honestly, telling them that i still love my ex-husband. And I have heard, "well, he's your ex for a reason." Yeah, because of stupidity on both of our parts. I hope and pray that we will remarry and start a family together. I wish that we had had children already. I am only 29 now, and was going through college when we were married, so it was out of the question for me at that time to plan a family. Anyways, I guess I'm posting this blog because I understand how those of you who wish to remarry feel. I believe that mistakes happen, and deciding to divorce can be a mistake. This is your life, so do what will ultimately make you happy.

julie



Ike40 -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (12/18/2008 10:44:56 AM)

No, even though I still love my x wife. She threw me out. I stayed single. I'm in love with solitude.



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (12/28/2008 1:36:32 AM)

My husband and I have been divorced for a year now, but I have always been in love with him. I didnt want the divorce, but had to get it so I could move on with my life. I always knew that one day he would change and come home. Well this Christmas he has done just that. Now, I'm terrified! I have wanted this with all of my heart, but I dont want to go backwards. He wants to get remarried. He tells me how he has changed and how he hit his rock bottom, and how he knows what he really wants. I'm afraid that if I say no, I will spend the rest of my life with all of the what if, but if I take him back and it happens again, then I have gone backwards..... I love him with everything that I am and I cant let it go. Do people really change????

sjr381



ChristineB -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (12/29/2008 6:41:26 PM)

I don't think so, at least not for anyone but themselves.  I know I wouldn't marry him again, for all the money in the world, even if we were the last two people on earth!



SuzanneDeAz -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (12/30/2008 1:46:34 PM)

I can not personally answer this cause my hubby and I are still married.  I can not imagine life without him.  Today he took the day off as I asked him too and he is out side now cleaning the poop of the dog, out beloved bull dog Lucy.

However, my niece the one who died of breast cancer 3 years ago leaving behind 4 children did remarry her Ex a few days before she died.  She kicked out the father of her 4th child and remarried the father of number 3 as he told her that if she remarried him God would heal her and that way they can raise her 4 kids with him.  She had 4 kids 4 fathers.  Well, it did not happen that way.  She died and the 4 kids ended up being split up. Him being only the father of her only son had access to only him.  I helped him with his son who was only 5 at the time of her death.  I finished homeschooling him that year and the next year put him and my daughter in a charter school that was half way between my sister and my house being that my sister took in the two younger girls.  So my daughter, Aden, the son, and the then just turned 7 year old girl, Aden's sister, Elyzah,  all were able to attend the same charter school.  That went on for one year.

The following year Aden and my daughter went to the same school and the sister went to a public school closer to my sister's house being she did not want to drive the distance.  Now she has moved and all of the girls , including the teen that is now 17 live  with my sister.  Elyzah and Aden go to the public school near her house and the oldest teen, almost 18 is in her last year attending a near by high school. My daughter is attending a charter school.  The little one now 5 is not in school and I may be able to teach her to read if she comes over a few days a week when I am not subbing.  Michelle's death has caused a lot of changes.  She remarried her ex thinking that they will be able to raise her and her 4 kids together but she died the next week and then all the changes occurred.  Life never stays the same.



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (1/4/2009 6:02:56 PM)

I was married twice, and divorced twice. Married 15 yrs. the first time and 12 yrs. the second time. Have been divorced from #2 for 9 yrs. Ex #1 contacted me (we live about 1,000 miles apart) and we have been in commuication for approximately 3 months. He has more feelings for me than I do for him (love-wise). He claims he never loved any other woman and will never love another woman - although during our marriage, I was ignored, put me down a lot, and constantly admired other women (to my face).His excuse for the way he treated me is a long story and just suffice it to say I find it hard to believe.We are in our 60's; his health is poor and he is unable to work and near poverty level. I am in excellent health, still work full time and am financially secure.It is very difficult for me to accept the fact that he is not just looking for a caretaker to support him. I've come a long way in my emotional and personal growth and am very content with my life and there is no way I will jump headlong into any situation that could very well end up one-sided. If I did that, I am sure I would leave him as I did before; and neither one of us needs to go through that again.I believe the success of remarrying an ex is dependent on the two people involved; the reason for the divoce in the first place; and where each is now in their life and growth. If one is not looking to take advantage of another and both are on the same path, have the same values and belief system; are both complete and content with who they are and with their lives, then maybe, just maybe it may work. And for any who make the decision to give it a go; I wish them all the best.

Suzanne



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (1/6/2009 5:09:17 PM)

I am just now in this situation. My ex husband and I have been apart for nearly 5 years. We have two children and have remained close friends. I was devistated when he left and waited for nearly 2 years, then finally went on with my life. He now says he has changed and realizes his mistke and wants us to be a family again. I was in a relationship with a man that I had so much in common with and were heading towards marriage. I felt so much pressure from both my ex family and my family that I decided I could not live with the guilt of my family not being together because of ME. I also know that God does not want divorce, so with that in mind and my family wanting my children to have their origional family, I said I would give it a shot. Now, I have left the other relationship and I am so lonley. My ex and I remained great friends during these years, but we dont' have anything beyond the kids in common. In my other relationship, we had a lot in common and talked numerous times during the day and evening. I feel very lonley and unsure. Is doing this for God and the children going to be enough? I love him like a brother, the love as a spouse died over time. I am so scared, but prepared to sacrifice myself for the good of my kids.

Heidi



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (1/18/2009 8:21:27 PM)

WE WERE MARRIED FOR22 YRS AND DIVORCED IN SEPTEMBER AND ARE PLANNING ON GETTING MARRIED AGAIN BY FEBUARY SOMETIMES YOU DON'T REALISE WHAT YOU HAD TIL ITS GONE

MARI



ArticlePost -> RE: Would You Remarry Your Ex-Spouse? (1/23/2009 7:46:31 PM)

I seem to remember reading somewhere about someone who remarried his ex because a computer matchmaker said they were perfect for each other.

AI



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