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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 8/14/2011 10:57:39 PM
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ArticlePost
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Im a teen but i may be of some help. Im 17 and i recently attended a conference called Do Hard Things. It basicly talked about how to be a person who influences and prmotes change at a young age. The speekers talked a lot about low expectations of kids/teens given to them by parents and other adults. As a teen i generaly agree. Most adults dont give much direction to kids my age and younger. I feel adults dont expect much out of us... The Reblelution is what im a part of now. Its kids/teens making a change in the way adult view us. (Give us credit, we can do more than you think.) If you agree or are interested in learning more, you can go to the Reblelution.com It was set up 6yrs back by two-16yr olds. My friends and I, aged 11-17 all agree with what was said. It kind of put the fire under our feet.
Manda
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 8/15/2011 9:42:08 AM
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ChristineB
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Okay, not that I am agreeing or disagreeing and I'm psyched to have a teen on the forum, however, let me say this: If you can do more, and want more responsibilities your writing must be legible for one.
Take the time to proofread if you want to taken seriously Manda. I had a hard time even following your post.
I have said this over and over, and frankly it worries me that children can't spell...take the extra second to write out the word you, not u...that is only if you want people to read your post AND take it seriously.
_____________________________
The Traveling Pendant
My Mom's dying wish....
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 10/31/2011 11:01:29 AM
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ArticlePost
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So I agree... but you have very easily described as the issue where are the solutions??? That's what I need. Give me a list of things I can do.
Nancy
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 11/7/2011 10:24:02 AM
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ArticlePost
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nooooooooo
nnn
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 11/7/2011 12:46:25 PM
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ArticlePost
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i tottally agree
crystal
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 11/20/2011 11:06:16 AM
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ArticlePost
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i did not find any helpful suggestions and dealings with real life happenings. I had 220 cousins , most of them did well in life barring a minuscule few who may not have excelled ,but did not do all that bad. Many of us were unruly teenagers with few very decent ones. Our parents were neither rich, very HIGHLY educated or sophisticated. But they spent far more time with us than present day parents.Because of today's economic pressure and over busy life style there are inherent problems.The time tested jt. family system helped adult supervision by aunts and uncles whren parents were away. There was a lot of peer pressure. Once my friends were trying to smoke bidis and they could not go on doing this because some distant visiting relative saw us and informed our parents. he did not know us nor did he care for us , but he felt it was his duty to help stop this because we were small children
rn padhi
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 2/4/2012 10:21:40 AM
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ArticlePost
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I have a 16 year old she is a good kid but the lack of personal responsibility drives me crazy!!! Today she missed drivers ed. because she neglected to tell me the place was hard to find. The instructor gave them printed directions in class and made a huge point of telling them to allow extra time for finding the building her simulator class was in. The teacher told them to be prompt, or be locked out. None of this was passed on to me. I entered the address into the GPS which said it would take 25 minutes. We arrived for class 8 minutes late due to spending 15 minutes looking for the building(we finally found it after my daughter pulled out the paper with the printed directions). All the doors were locked,I called the instructors cell phone and was informed she was late and would not be admitted. It was obvious my daughter had not been paying attention in class and didn't think the directions were important for me to have. I am not sure how to change this behavior. She will miss the bus home from school (I make her wait 2 hours to get picked up). She has missed doing things with her friends due to not communicating with me (I refuse to drop everything last minute to accommodate her social-life). She never knows were to go,or what time to be there for her sports, or makes me wait in the car 45 minutes, because practice was extended or the times changed (I have dragged her from practice early and made her scramble to figure out were to go and how to get there). I have been a stay at home mom her entire life, my full time job was her and her sister. I managed everyone's schedules, including hubby's. Things really changed a 1 1/2 ago when my husband was diagnosed with cancer and died 7 months later. I am trying to prepare my daughter for when I go back to school next month and eventually to work, but learning by consequences is not helping. I have explained that teachers, coaches, and moms don't send e-mail or call to pass along info., their expectation is a 16 year old is capable of telling a parent important information. The biggest problem seems to be she isn't listening when information is being given.I have lectured her until I am blue in the face. I am really scared she is missing the life skills of listening and taking responsibility for her life. We recently moved and there is no support system in place in the event of a problem. I am starting school in a month and it is a 40 minute drive from home and the classes are only offered in the evening. There is nobody to help out if she screws up and misses the bus (school is 8 miles away and not a safe walk home). I made a giant mistake by thinking she was a kid and it was my job as mom to take care of things. She never need to listen, because I was. If she missed the bus I was only a phone call away and hearing me yell was the only consequence. The lack of responsibility is taught at a young age by parents thinking they are nurturing their kids. We expect a magic switch to flip when they enter their teen years and it doesn't happen that way. Teaching responsibility starts young. It will be a long and difficult process undoing years of not expecting much from "my little girl". I have learned the hard way, and she is likely to do the same.
Mich
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 2/15/2012 8:46:08 PM
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ArticlePost
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Isn't it our job as parents to take care of them? I think the common problem (which I also need help with) is that we don't know when to stop taking care of them and letting them take care of themselves.
Kelly
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 2/20/2012 10:18:11 PM
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ArticlePost
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It is our job to take care of them, but the problem is with the way we define "take care of". A warm place to sleep, food to eat, and clothes on their back. Everything esle is EXTRA. We want to give them more than we had, but if we give to much, they have no drive.
Denna
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 2/26/2012 11:38:25 AM
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ArticlePost
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Mich, you may want to have your daughter checked for attention deficit. My oldest son has it without the hyperactivity so he was passed over and never diagnosed until I had him tested at a reputable facility outside of school. He is now on medication and can REMEMBER directions, schoolwork assignments soooo much better. I thank God for the clarity that he has given our family in learning that my son wasn't as much irresponsible as frustrated more than I was at his lack of memory and being able to organize his life. He is definitely better and more responsible but still needs to be put back on track sometimes. Get your daughter's school counselor or an advisor assigned to her than you and she can establish a working relationship with. Also try an organized study hall that will help her keep up with school work so she can still play sports , etc. I hope this helps.
Karen
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RE: Teaching Teens Responsibility - 4/28/2012 10:39:50 AM
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ArticlePost
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We talk about children being responsible, but it is the parent that needs to be responsible for teaching them that responsibility. We act like they should know but don't take the time to actually teach them. We give and spoil and love and lecture and still wonder why they don't get it. To me, 13 years of age is a good time to really start teaching kids to "get it". From the time they wake up (by setting their own alarm) to the time they go to bed. Their are endless opportunities to turn young people into responsible adults but we must take the time to teach.
Maribel
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