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teen step daughter moody and spoiled - 11/5/2009 10:15:41 AM
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neverends
Posts: 1
Joined: 11/5/2009
Status: offline
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I have been remarried for two years now and have a 16 year old step daughter. I went thru the teen years before with my daughter and there was some drama but not like now with my step daughter. when she doesnt get something to go her way, she will give you this look! its like the look of death, almost like she is looking right thru you!! i have told her not to give me that look and she hasnt....but she still gives it to her mother, boyfriend and i am sure to the little amount of friends she has. i have told her, she is scaring off all the other girls with her attitude! are most teen girls like this?
One minute she will be laughing and then just like flipping a switch BAD MOOD instantly! i Honostely have never seen anything like it. She seems to live for stirring up drama over anything. Getting her to pick up after herself is like pulling teeth....on weekends she thinks because there is no school, that she is on vacation and doesnt have to do anything. she was an onley child, but now my teen son lives with us 50% of the time. they get along fine, and have never gotten into any arguments @ all. She will tell on him for not doing a specific chore though. My wife will admit she has spoiled her @ times. She also thinks that money grows on trees and has no concept of where money actauly comes from. When i was 16 i dont remember being anything like this.? She only visits her dad on birthdays and or holidays, because she knows there will be presents and or money involved. ( taking advantage of them) I love her to death, and my wife has told me that in two years I have been more of a father to her than her own dad has ever been. I think sometimes my wife just gives into her, so she deosnt have to deal with the crying or whining! some times you would think she is a 3 year old! (example: if the house door is locked and she cant get the key to work..she will stand out side with the look andexpect someone to open it for her)
a 16 year old she be able to unlock a door!!? you have to be smarter than the average door? she basiaclly is a straight A student, except for Math where she gets B's and C's. she will come home from school crying beacuse she doesnt understand some work, but will not ask the teacher for extra help. We say we will talk to the techer and she blows up!! everytime she is studying for a test she will say " I am going to fail this!" then the next day she comes home with a grade from 95-100%.
she is close to getting her drivers licsense but she is still a little scary behind the wheel. we have tried to teach her about money but it goes in one ear and out the other. The other day we where showing her how much the auto insurance was going to rise with her on the policy. She immediatley started crying and said "what ever, i guess I will get to drive when I am 21" we never said anything about her not getting her liscence or not being added to the policy. We just wanted her to see how much it cost and what we where sacrificing for her to drive.
all of this is really taking a toll on my wife and I.
sorry for all the rambling, but could really use some advise! thank you!!
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RE: teen step daughter moody and spoiled - 11/6/2009 9:39:41 AM
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fiery
Posts: 2820
Joined: 11/4/2007
Location: in front of my computer
Status: offline
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Lay it on the line for both her AND mom that she needs to shape up and grow up. Don't get her on the insurance! I'd do zero for her and give her nothing right now. It makes me so angry the way kids think they have a right to everything now and don't need to earn things like that. Tell her she can wait until she's 41 never mind 21 if that's how long it takes her to behave like an adult and be civil to the people that put a roof over her head plus take responsibility for chores.
I know I never behaved like that at 16 and if I had my dad would have killed me. The door thing, I'm sorry but that is just pathetic. Let her stand there if she can't open it. She'll soon figure it out if no-one comes running. Don't tolerate it. Your wife isn't helping her - she's enabling. The girl will never grow up if your wife doesn't quit treating her like a baby. She needs to be a grown up here herself too and lead by example instead of you being alone in this. Present a united front. Good luck!
If it's any consolation, you're not alone. Read this thread: http://forums.familylobby.com/the_joys_of_raising_a_teenage_daughter/m_9484/tm.htm
_____________________________
The Cuckleburr Times
Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart... - William Wordsworth
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